Life is generally made up of things that we expect to happen and things that we do not expect.  If these things are positive, we rejoice, feel happy and cheerful.  We are in a good mood because of our happiness in our current circumstance.  It could be the purchase of a wanted item, a promotion, met an interesting person, or just watched a good movie.  Our mindsgo over and over again through all of these good things that happened we are rewarded internally with a flood of wonderful emotions.

This sounds great, however, one thing we know about life: Everything is impermanent, even life itself.  We might care a lot about our new car, but thirty years from now, it will most probably have been recycled into something else. We may be happy about our possessions, or personal relationships, but some time from now, that thing, or that person, will not be there anymore. So, how can we be happy at all if all our happiness depends on something that is not permanent? How can we make happiness permanent in an impermanent universe?

We can understand, and incorporate deeply into our souls that happiness as we know it is merely a state of mind that relies on what we perceive as our identity. The things, persons, achievements that we feel that define us as a person. So, what can we do if this unstable foundation falls apart? (And it most certainly will.)

You can worry, be concerned, depressed, and stressed. Maybe you will think over and over again through the fact that you don't have any more that job, car, or relationship on which your whole identity relied. How would that make you feel? Angry? Sad? Hurt? You might feel like you just want that back, and attach to that. But in the end, you won't feel happy any more.  What should we do about that?

Feeling sad about a break up, job loss, or car wreck are all normal and natural emotion and the grief should be dealt with.  New cars, new jobs, and new relationships are great, but don't allow yourself to find your identity in those feelings.  We should detach ourselves from those ties. In the long term our happiness should be independent from external circumstances.   In those really tough moments, or those moments of pure joy, bear in mind that they are simply impermanent occurrences in the broader scope of your life.  Detach from momentary feelings and choose to feel happy in every moment.